Since Kristin Key first tried her hand at stand-up comedy six years ago, she's visited 28 states, gone through four cars and may now finally be getting her big break.
HBK comes out with his funeral preparations and says the funeral is for Taker, not Michaels. Shawn recounts all the things he�s done to Taker recently, including running around on his fake tombstone and apparently desecrating the Styrofoam. Michaels opens the casket, proving Taker isn�t hiding inside of it. The lights go out and when they come back on Taker is in the ring by himself. He can�t seem to find Michaels despite THE LOUD NOISE OF A CASKET CLOSING AND THAT IT IS NO LONGER OPEN. Taker does a slow take of the casket. Taker opens it but it turns out he was hiding under the casket and he gets the drop with another super kick. Shawn does a DX cross chop.....because he can.Back to the show where for some reason the Pussy Cat Dolls are going to be at Wrestlemania, or at least one of them. She asks us if we want to see her there. They replay the segment that was silent before and he said �You were expecting someone else?�. Lawler returns to the ringside but still decides to forego putting on clothes while Cole recounts every horrible thing we�ve seen tonight so far in case we were deluded good things had happened. Rey Mysterio as Skeletor arrives. I�ll head scissors you He-man! JBL arrives to us to say that tonight is psychological to let Mysterio know he won�t stand a chance, because apparently you should give away PPV matches on TV for free.Being on "Last Comic Standing" reminded Key why she started down this path in the first place -- taking the stage at an open-mic night when she was 19 and falling so instantly in love with stand- up that she quit college the same week.JBL def. Rey ReyEdge def. Show and CenaWhere: Loonees Comedy Corner, 1305 N. Academy Blvd.Thats That!After the match, Edge slips into the ring and just starts beating the holy hell out of Cena after a shared stare with Big Show. We get a replay of Michaels escaping Undertaker. This brings me to rant about how every single feud for Wrestlemania has been built terribly with one person looking way too strong. Uhghh.Predictions:Christian wins MITBWe see footage that a car just arrived in the back and Orton calls out Legacy and some random security to protect himself with. The limo is opened outside and no one is inside according to the camera man. Orton demands that Triple H come out and face him�and his security�and his friends�.yeah�The music that plays though is Vince McMahon who looks like he just sniffed something awful. Shane arrives as well. The last is Triple H himself. The McMahon Squad kicks the crap out of security instead of just firing them. The brawl breaks out with Vince taking on Ted and Shane taking Cody. Trips and Orton brawl into the ring and the show goes off the air....Alot of talent on show here (it�s not as hot as it sounds) and it starts off with Jillian and Mickie James. Mickie leaps onto her and beats Jillian around with ease, tagging out to Tiffany. Jillian trades out to Beth who runs her over. Actually I don�t know who half of these women are but Tiffany rolls up whoever this dark haired chick is for the three. That was surprisingly fast.Back to the show where we replay Jericho crushing Ric�s watch. We cut to Jerry who has presumably been making everyone in the ring listen to his crappy theme this whole time before aspiring Mankini Model Chris Jericho arrives.Winners: Faces"I've done a lot of gigs where you play a show at 10 at night and then you drive 10 hours the next day with no one but yourself and your hangover," Key said on her cell phone while doing just that for a per- formance in her home state of Texas. "I think I've paid my dues. I'm kind of happy I'm starting to see some rewards."Back to the show for Wrestlemania 11 recap. John Cena is out next to take on The Big Show. This leads me to believe that once again our main event tonight is just going to be a speech from Orton that probably will break out into a fight....Tasked with basing jokes on "Modern Knitting," Key came back with: "Along with knitting an outfit that's going to get Johnny his $&* kicked, why don't you knit him some new self-esteem."Im Curtis Kash and thanks for reading!!Back to the show where we get replays of Edge vs. Cena and Edge vs. Big Show. Edge approaches Cena in the back and convinces him to team up against Big Show at Mania to take him out since he knocked out both of their asses with ease before. Cena says it makes sense but he�d rather lose on his own than get help. We cut from this to Dibiase who says what Orton has to say will change the WWE universe forever. We�ve been stuck with Cole by himself for this whole segment. When is Lawler coming back? He didn�t get his ass kicked that bad. We cut to the coffin in the hearse and Shawn Michaels rises out but apparently the sound guy forgot to turn his microphone on as we go to commercial.
To view: "Last Comic Standing," 8 p.m. Tuesdays, NBC
Author: ANDREW WINEKE THE GAZETTE
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